Orange is the New Black, an unintentional sketch


A little drawing while I was watching Netflix's new series, Orange is the New Black. There is a unintentional resemblance to Piper Chapman, the main actor in the series, as she appears in the first 3 episodes (freaked out is the word for her). Seriously, I began a landscape, drawing in some lines for bark that became her hair. Le sigh. In a little Moleskine notebook, 7.5" x 10", nice for writing and drawing and fits in my purse.___

 brendaclews.com
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One of the Walking Narratives

This drawing is in my writing Moleskine since my art one is finished. It began as a doodle but became quite a complex drawing. The figure is... well, divide it in half and see.*

 

One of the Walking Narratives, 2012, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", graphite, India and acrylic inks in a Moleskine journal.

Written into the drawing:

CINDERBLOCKS OF TIME
DON'T WAIT FOR ME

moments
redeem
themselves

baby
you are
a walking
NARRATIVE

OIL
MAN
OIL WOMAN
OILMANOILW
OMAN OIL MA
N OIL WO
MANOILWOMA
NOILMANOIL
WOMANOILMAN
OILMANOIL

always there
should be
reeds blowing
in the
wind

___

*hint: I wanted to do a half woman/half man figure and am surprised at how uncanny the image is. You have to hold the straight edge of something, an envelope or a pen, on that blue dividing line, and look either way. To my eye, it's not a manifestation of the same figure in two sexes, but two similar yet different figures who are combined as one.

One of the potential titles had been, Man On the Edge of Becoming Woman, or Woman on the Edge of Becoming Man. In many ways, we are both.


 brendaclews.com
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"Praise the world to the Angel, not the unsayable"


"Praise the world to the Angel, not the unsayable," sketch in-process, 2012, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", graphite, Moleskine folio Sketchbook A4. Title is a quote from Rilke's 9th Duino Elegy.

It gave me peculiar pleasure tonight to work on some anatomical shadowing, not entirely successful, but getting there.

The chest to my eye isn't quite right, and I need to imagine myself into that rib cage (or another, I won't tinker with this drawing now) for a better anatomical shadowing rendition. I went to this site, gratis of a beautiful artist where, when doesn't have live models, one can practice.
 
It'd be easier if I printed an image out, but I don't. I sit 3 or 4 feet back, with my mid-distance and close-up bifocals on, and draw straight from the screen, imagining my way into the body I am drawing. :smiles:

I feel this man, his strength, the strength of his anguish, the poetry in him, his agility to throw the masses of fabric high like wings. He becomes a Rilkean man under my pencil.


(My mother fading; bad news from the MRI on my wrist; and other difficulties in my personal life. I find I can't write or make videopoems but that drawing and painting help to still my mind and thus allow some relief from the stress.)

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The Living Carry the Souls of the Dead


The Living Carry the Souls of the Dead, 2012, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", charcoal and oils, Moleskine folio Sketchbook A4.


The spirits of the dead are held aloft by the living.

My grandmother's spirit was my father's memory of her in me and projected by me into a nurturing maternal spirit of safety.

Has she been with me all my life? Yes. But she resides in the energy of my understanding of her through my deceased father's memory.


The figure I have drawn, that I made from bones, who is an experiment in charcoal, seems not the narrator of the writing, and yet she is carrying the souls of the dead, look at her.

Notes on process: First I drew her skeleton, all her vertebrae are there, and her rib cage and sternum, clavicles and humeri, radiuses, and ulnas, femora, and bony pelvis. Then I drew her major muscles, her craniofacial muscles, pectorals, abdominals, femora, the wrap of arm muscles, tendons over the phalange of the fingers. I traced her body's outline with charcoal, and poured some sizing medium (Gak100, for the paper) over her, smudging and sweeping the charcoal with a brush. Red seemed to be her colour, so on my table of oil tubes, used paper towels, half a dozen water jars, a real mess, I searched through a box for the Alizarin Crimson, and began to dry brush it into the wet solution. I tried other colours, delicately, but she was insistent, and so I rubbed them out. After some indefinable time - the clock stops when you are working with a fast drying medium - a few sweeps of orange seemed permissible in her sheer dress, and the white highlights, composed of charcoal white, white oil pastel and Titanium White water-soluble oil paint. My son says she looks like she could be a cover for Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.

She is a bit scary, but she has fine bones, a good musculature. :)

She is somewhere between life and death, where the soul resides.


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The Saluki Returns

Painted this more than a week back, and wasn't sure about the way it scanned, but then I took a photo in sunlight and the colours came up properly, so sharing now.

She was the smartest dog I ever met. The sketch underlying the painting was about her paws, which were almost like elongated hands with thick black fingernails.

The Saluki is an Egyptian desert dog, and often travelled with nomadic tribes across the Sahara.The Saluki is the oldest domesticated breed, representations of Saluki-like dogs can be found on Sumerian seals dating around 7,000BC, and they are depicted in the paintings on the walls of tombs of Pharohs from 2,250BC-1,650BC. Thousands of generations to now, an extraordinarily ancient and intelligent breed.



Painting of a Sleeping Saluki, 2012, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, graphite, acrylic, India and acrylic inks, Moleskine folio Sketchbook A4.





Sketch of a Saluki, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, graphite, Moleskine folio Sketchbook A4.

You remember this one from a bit back. I had intended to paint it also, but a few people, including the owner of the dog, who is considering a commission of it in a large size, asked me to leave it as a simple pencil sketch.


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Dancer


Happy with this painting of a dancer in my Moleskine. Why? She is lithe and muscular, and has an elegance. She also looks like she's dancing in an ink painting. Splotches of black India ink move over her; she is situated in torrents of acrylic flame red ink. In her dance, she holds still for a moment and her pose imparts a tension of the energy of emotion. There is life, passion and death here.

What I most enjoyed was overdoing this piece. Many inks were dip penned and brush spread until it was a mess, and then, miraculously, I washed the inks off, using all my rags and a half roll of paper towels, wetting and blotting until the sketch began to re-emerge.

With that weight of paint removed from her, of which only I hold the memory, she is again lithe, ready to spring.

And I had to laugh when someone said she looked intersex, and admit ever since Fellini's Satyricon, and then Jung's exploration of the hermaphrodite, I've felt intersex in dreams or art can be a powerful image of inner union. If my Dancer appears to be both woman and man, I am delighted.

Not sure why, since I don't usually anymore, I scanned the sketch, and then the first wash of black India ink and permanent red acrylic ink, and I took an iPhone photo early in the process of adding the inks that I later removed. I have included these three in-process photos, along with the final one (it's first, on the left), for you so you can see the progression of this little painting that took the greater part of last Sunday to complete.

Dancer, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, graphite, India and acrylic inks, Moleskine folio Sketchbook A4.

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Drawing of a Young Man


I drew this on Saturday, from life, while wearing two pairs of glasses! An old pair of prescription readers enabled me to see detail at a distance, and a small drugstore pair perched on the end of my nose allowed me to see my drawing on the paper. Hopefully I can get progressive bifocal or perhaps trifocal lenses soon - it was a crazy way to draw! ::laughing:: Though I did achieve a likeness, something that's been inexplicably eluding me in my return to drawing. 

Figure, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, graphite.



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Self-Portrait Study 3, a painting


Self-Portrait Study 3, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, graphite, oils, India and acrylic inks.

In the Moleskine, the earlier sketch in this blog this month. (No, I never ever wear eyeliner like that, not in my whole life. Anyway, it's a self portrait that is its own painting and only has some resemblance to me.)

I wanted it to have something beyond itself, be piercing somehow, and even be hard to look at. Somewhat disheveled and distorted, a sadness there, the more difficult realities of our experience, I guess.

In the initial sketch, I wasn't trying to draw a 'self-portrait' for anyone else, only trying to draw what I saw in this little, round magnifying mirror that was somewhat distorting but at least I could see detail without readers. The woman in the sketch had a 'sad and stricken' look, as one commenter wrote.

In the finished painting you see here, in her eyes I hope there is  concern, compassion, fear, sadness, hope, love, remembrance, and the wild ride that life is, with its inexplicable ups and downs, its times of plenty and times of drought.

Leonard Cohen, in a CBC interview I heard last Sunday afternoon, spoke about how we are all, in one way or another, trying to align our will with Divine Will. I'd call the latter, fate, fortune, life, the way it goes, the Tao.

The woman in the painting is caught right in the crux of moment between individual will and that of the life force, aligning an acceptance of fate, of karma, of whatever the forces are, and perhaps learning that allowing the horror of the pain is an empowerment in itself.


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The Woman Who Is Not Quite Effaced


'The Woman Who Is Not Quite Effaced,' 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, graphite, acrylic, gel pen.

You might recognize the underlying sketch, which I never liked, and which I always intended to sweep paint over.

Yes, I am at a rather difficult juncture, where someone seems intent on effacing references to me and who ignores my best work, which has had an effect on not just me but other people who have noticed this exclusion, and so I was not able to participate in a writing group this January and have had to suspend posting my articles at VidPoFilm.

I am in discussion over the problems with a number of people, all of whom recommend suspending my articles until what to do becomes clearer.

This painting expresses, what do I call it, that attempt at effacement, but also that it will not work.


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Tulips and Daffodils, Day 2, Painting 2

Tulips and Daffodils 2, 2012, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", India inks, oils, Moleskine folio Sketchbook.

My second portrait of the flowers, done yesterday. In my Mole. I had a rough internal day, and this little painting took far longer than it looks like it did. I rubbed out and re-did the vase many times, for instance, as well as the background. The India ink would not adhere to the wet oil paint, either, and thus I struggled through the hours. In the end, it didn't seem worth the effort. Some days are like that.

(I do laugh, though. If you know anything of my green fire, chthonic rhizome garden goddess, you might see her here. Entirely unintentional - but garden goddesses who are molecular frenzies, chlorophyll arias, are like that - one arm bent behind her hourglass figure in a blue strapless dress, her bosom bursting green stalks,  yellow daffodils and red tulips, no head, but you can't have everything... lol)

On the table, today, the tulips are fully opened and on the edge of wilting, their moment of glory passing, the daffodils are still singing, their stems  plunged in the vase of water, and I'm hankering to paint them all again. I think I'm ready to make the transition from working solely in my Moleskine Sketchbook to canvas. On the phone this morning checking canvas prices, wow, quite a range! A 16"x20" regular stretched and primed canvas sells for $7.-$12.00! Then I found an art store way downtown that had a 5-pack deal for $22.00. It meant a 6km hike, a huge shoulder bag, and my dog, with my badly sprained wrist, a bit fearful, but I couldn't leave my woofy honey at home!

Though the trip took awhile, with a few other stops, I returned with the purchased canvases. By that time the light was disappearing, but I did manage a rough sketch on a canvas. So... maybe another painting before the flowers drop away. Maybe.

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Self-Portrait Study 4, in pencil



Self-Portrait Study 4, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, graphite.

'Nother one. The right side, from your view, is not too bad; not sure what happened to the other half. The nose is not too bad either. Pencil work like this is so delicate. I used a 2B technical pencil. Feeling closer to approaching the painting, though, and drawing on the canvas itself (my drawing has to be a good likeness even if I obscure it with layers of paint and various scratchings). This is my 4th study, done in the 7.5" distorted magnifying mirror that I bought at the dollar store yesterday. The light is daylight. Once again, too impatient to do the hair with its curls properly, though that would increase the likelihood of a better likeness.

This self-portrait in pencil took as long as it took to drink my first mug of coffee this morning. The Italian gold French-press coffee wasn't even cold when I'd finished (I do love my coffee). I am rather pleased with the drawing, after so many attempts to learn how to draw my aging self. I mean, I may look in the bathroom mirror in the mornings for 5 minutes, washing face, brushing teeth, applying tinted moisturizer and a touch of pencil grey eyeliner and some lip gloss. Who wants to look any longer than that?

The mirror distorts the face in a different way to the camera, so neither is perfect, but I am glad I persisted with using the mirror to draw from because at least the image I look at is breathing, looking, sipping coffee, and remembering to smile!


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Self-Portrait Study 3, in pencil

Self-Portrait Study 3, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, graphite.

Just before shop closing I got the 'bright' idea to run out and try to find a magnified 'make-up' mirror, thinking my problem is that I can't see up close without readers (which I don't wear otherwise). I found a  7.5" diagonal mirror at the dollar store for $2.99! Distorted glass? -maybe. Then, on my way out with my dog, I stopped and thought, why not just try something quickly? Ha.

An hour later. The eyes resemble mine, but a bit big. Too lazy to do all those curls, indication suffices. After staring intently at the magnified mirror, and sketching what I saw, I ended up finishing my drawing holding the Moleskine sketchbook against my chest looking into a large mirror and drawing backhand what I saw reflected!

I've certainly got my desperate and perplexed look at how difficult doing damn drawing of myself is! I have a 30" x 40" canvas ready and waiting, but am trying to learn how to draw my aging face as we get acquainted again seemingly for new (since I haven't achieved a true likeness yet - resemblance, yes, yes, but....).

Onward, fearless artist(s!... :) :)

We traverse different versions of ourselves without a quizzical blink anyhow. Other people in real life never look quite like they do in photographs, and if you stand with them looking into a mirror, it's a whole other person again. I am always amazed by this - and yet, each 'image' is recognizably 'that person.' The real life person is three-dimensional, you almost never see anyone face-on like in a photo, but rather from various angles, and they are not cropped by the frames of the photo either, but full body in an environ. I find my reading of the curves and hollows and lights and shadows of a person's face is never anything like the camera's rendition, no matter what lighting or angles it captures. Some people are photogenic and look incredible in photos, while others who are beautiful don't photograph well, but mostly everyone kind of resembles themselves. The mirror image is always mind-blowing, though who can comment coherently on it? Stand at a bathroom mirror with your lover or family member or friend and see something of what they see and you'll understand what I mean. Truly, we are mysteries, not only to ourselves, but each other.

The body is unknowable. Our art, and photographs, and mirrors only offer approximations of who we are.

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Woman in Red and Blue (final painting)

Woman in Red and Blue, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, mixed media.


Posting again because I fiddled a bit with and cropped this portrait. The scanner, while enabling a high resolution/good colour image, misses texture. One day I'll get a decent camera to take these paintings - this one is scored with lines from toothpicks, dental tools, knitting needles, and different media - pens, inks, paints, rubbings and scratchings... I didn't like the initial sketch (self portrait drawn looking into a mirror) and was too impatient to work on it so I thought I'd see how the figure could emerge through washes of black paint, and then all the other media I used, inks, acrylics, oils, from fountain pen inks, dip pens, ball point pens and brushes and cloths. Often I spray fixatives between layers too, so there's a few of those. A figure does emerge, and there's a welter of emotion in that worked surface. I have a 30" x 40" Windsor and Newton canvas still unopened for a self portrait, and so am doing studies, not just for facial features (haven't hit home quite yet) but for painting techniques.


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Woman in Red and Blue


From my Moleskine Project today:

Woman in Red and Blue, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, mixed media.


You might guess, I am working on studies for a self portrait painting. Still haven't achieved a good likeness (according to my beloved children), 'but,' they say, they 'like them anyhow.'

I layered this with different types of inks, pens, paints, scratchings, and so on. You might be able to see the detail if it opens in full screen and gives you an option to view at original size.

Let's hope so.

:)


While the darker image is from a scanner, this is closer to what the painting looks like in bright natural daylight (it's an earlier version, too).

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Iridescent Blue Face



From my Molsekine Project today:


Iridescent Blue Face, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, multimedia.

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Study for a Self-Portrait Painting



Self-Portrait Study, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, graphite.

A study for a self-portrait that I plan to paint... will have to try a few more sketches, I guess. Not quite right, but recognizable enough. Just did this one now, after a frigid dog walk. I do look so serious, but then, I am. :) Though pretty much always smile, guess I was intently drawing - in a dark room, too. 2B pencil. Note to self: smile a little when you do the painting. :)



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Coil of Koi in Dark Water


Coil of Koi in Dark Water, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, multi-media.

Finished, unless I slightly whiten some of those Koi edges. I sparingly brushed the koi with some translucent paints (vellum, blue, orange, yellow), which glimmer. The fish have a pearlescence that you can see if you tilt the painting in the light.

They are like angels rising from Dante's Inferno.



Earlier version: 


Coil of Fish, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, multi-media.


I have rubbed this out many times! Was going to scratch the koi out and add oranges, yellows, golds; so far, it's not working. I used a wooden toothpick to scratch the koi out, but the underpainting of acrylic 'bone black' had dried too much, leaving them with a ghostly presence.

They are like angels rising in dark water, and I may have to just accept that.

In process!

From my recent NaNo novel: 'When the plump Chinese lady who owned the store came over to feed the koi, the fish swirled to the top of the tank, a mass of watercolours and oils coiling and curving and looping in and out of each other as each fish rose to eat bits of the koi feed. Their gills translucent against the misted windows of the store.

The glass thinned, melted and the koi are flung out of the tank as the water rushed out, a coiling, spawning tidal wave. The gills of the koi became soft wings, they grew like when you drop a stopper of ink into water and patterns of ink coil and flow outwards and upwards as they disperse. The koi’s filmy, translucent wings spread and grew thinner as they rose, a coiling mass of golds, oranges, yellows and browns, a living tree spinning upwards, a whirlpool of fish like leaves flowing into the sky, for the ceiling had disappeared.'


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fleurs, la mort, le bouffon...


fleurs, la mort, le bouffon..., 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, multi-media.

Another page in the story of my challenge with black.

...at the edge of the world where flowers drop their petals...

What can I say, fleurs, la mort, le bouffon...

Papytroll Michel (on Facebook) wrote: "Que survivent les fleurs;un leger répit avant de mourrir. Un beau contraste couleurs chaudes/froides et noir/blanc. That survive flowers; a leger respite before of dying. A beautiful contrast warm / cold colors and black / white."

"Papytroll Michel," I responded, "you write poetry, beautiful. And, yes, so close to reality. You have no idea."

Then he came back and wrote another comment: "J'adore aussi le graphisme et le coup de pinceau incisif de ce personnage très empathique. Le trait noir rehausse l'expression et les volumes.J'aurai les moyens financiers, je te le commanderai.J'ai tenu une galerie d'art associative dans les années 1990 à Lyon(sud est france) et visité plus de 300 artistes en 2 ans (verrier-tapissier-céramiste-sculpteur-peintre-plasticien) pour mes émissions radiophoniques sur l'art.De beaux souvenirs me reviennent quand je parcours des oeuvres. J'en présente régulièrement dans mes articles sur ce site. Continues à me séduire, Brenda.

[He translates, or through Google translate, to leave his messages in English also] I also like the graphics(handwritting) and the incisive bow of this very empathic character. The black line(feature) heightens the expression and the volumes.

I shall have financial means, I shall command (order) it you. I held an associative art gallery in the 1990s in Lyon (the South is France) and visited more than 300 artists in 2 years (verrier-tapissier-céramiste-sculpteur-p eintre-plastics technician) for my radio programs on the art. Beautiful memories (souvenirs) return to me when I cross (go through) works. I present it regularly in my articles on this site. Continues to seduce me, Brenda."

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Three Cocoon-Nests







Three Cocoon-Nests, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, multi-media.



It is a little Surreal -just think what might hatch from those cocoon-nests... there is something strange about them.

I saw them in my mind last night when I was thinking about what to paint today. What are they? And what will emerge?

While there was a bare tree outside my window, it was too dark to see, and, yes, it's like yesterday's tree, but remember, I'm working in a Moleskine sketchbook, and that page was closed, so I painted from my imagination.


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Springer Spaniel


The original sketch of the dog, from life, and she wouldn't sit still, even with many treats placed on the windowsill, was in Private Reserve fountain pen ink that is not permanent. The image lost its delicacy with a matte fixative, which blended the lines. Then I created a loose background by looking at the bare trees outside my living room window. I quite like the effects in the background, but they do not work with the drawing of my dog stylistically. I was in a funk before I began - it's not surprising that I ended up with a funk. My morning Moleskine page from today.

I could turn my poor baby into some fetal thing hanging from the tree. Two Geists were working in me today (metaphorically speaking, no, no, I don't 'channel'!), and they weren't into each other's vision.

Springer Spaniel, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, multi-media.

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House Plant 3


'House Plant, 3', 4 drafts, 21cm x 29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, oils.

Not to be undone by black, I begin again. A lighter black wash, and quickly brushing the main forms out of it.




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'A House Plant': Two Days, Two Different Moods

From my Moleskine project: the house plant on my dining room table, yesterday's painting, and today's. Two very different renditions.


Yesterday's painting of the house plant on my dining room table. Colour is still not quite right.

Today's painting of the
house plant on my dining
room table. Acrylic bone
black base.


2nd Draft. Oil paints,
then scratched over. I
wiped it off.



3rd Draft today. Where I left it. I took the photo in daylight shade; it's darker than this in the Moleskine.





The first and last are in my Moleskine sketchbook - the three middle ones were on the way to the last one, to the left, which is likely finished.

The painting is dark and depressing, it disappears in the shadows, but in the light isn't too bad. A matte fixative will decrease the shine in it, too.




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Moleskine painting: 'A House Plant'



The House Plant, 21cm x  29cm, 8" x 11.5", 2012, Moleskine folio Sketchbook, oils, India and watercolour inks.

A meditation in ink on the plant, which withdraws its essence into its own mystery even as it offers its vibrancy. The brush wet with ink, you only have one chance. Lift the brush, glide it on the paper.

This plant is on my dining room table. I painted it in my Moleskine this morning. Yes, maybe I am trying to speed up.

I'm thinking to leave this, and go on trying to fill up my Moleskine... I started it last February! And only a dozen paintings so far out of a hundred pages? Later I can come back to finish pieces. Like leaving a rough draft of a poem for awhile before polishing it, it is often better to give some time to the process of creating a painting.

I used a little Sony Cybershot bought in 2007 to take this photo, and I think I need to figure out the white balance since the paper is a whitish cream colour, not the tone here.

Okay, why am I painting pretty little pictures like this anyhow? I'm trying to go backwards to go forwards. To re-find something in my art that was lost a long time ago. This painting tells me I've found it. Because of that, I may leave it essentially alone when I finish it. Tighten it up, rather than cover it with a scrawl of lines. I'm not attempting realism in any way. It's another quest altogether. Working on the drawings and paintings in this sketchbook is taking me to deep, interior places, and already as I turn the pages, looking at them, they describe my journey there.


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My Moleskine Folio Sketchbook A4

I have created an album for my Moleskine drawings. They are quite diverse in their styles I think. Some of them I like; others need more work. I put a detail of one of my favourites first, because that's for show, but then they appear in the order in which they were created, which is not always the order of the pages...

If you click on any of the thumbnails, a lightbox will appear, with all the images in a row on the bottom -click on the next one to make it large, and then you don't have to move your mouse from that position, just keep clicking and you'll go through all the images at screen size. I like the lightbox because the background is black. Embedded below the table I created for the thumbnails is a slideshow, with the captions (the little captions icon in the bottom left of the slideshow window is a toggle switch, click on the playbar and then on it to make them disappear).

I'm not very far into the Mole, and it is my project for the year. Expect a video when the sketchbook is finished!
















 









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The Dancer's Backskin


The Dancer's Backskin, 2011, 21cm x 29cm, 8"x11.5"
ink, watercolour on Moleskin notebook paper.
click for larger size

the dancer's backskin,
Moleskine sketchbook

the paper
cracked
like a boiled
eggshell
when you
tap it
tap it

_


The drawing was an accident - I had bought a new Moleskine notebook, the largest ever for me. When I brushed water over watercolour pencil the paper shredded badly and cracked like an eggshell when dry. Intrigued with the effect, and having seen Natalie Portman's incredible performance in Black Swan, the self-mutilation, the hallucinations, the madnesses, I thought of the underside of the dancer's life. Or her backskin.

In the image you see here, I layered a scan of the frontside of the drawing facing forwards (you can see it in the lines at the borders) under the backside which I made slightly opaque. I banded the dancer's face (some horror there, she is buried alive in her inhuman effort to be graceful for us), and her feet (to remind us of ballet as an echo of Geisha footbinding).


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In the Middle of the Summer that Summer

Paint becoming the sediment out of which it was made, a little muddy, silted. A cave painting. I understand the images and the picture is whole. From my personal mythology, where I cohere my experience. Not quite free association but like parts of a dream represented concurrently together. Re-finding who I am through what I lost.


finished painting (click on images for larger size) - it has a powdery quality and a slight glow,
a 'cave painting' sense, not quite revealed...



pre-painting sketch

In the Middle of that Summer, 2008-2009, multi-media: -oils -graphite -water-soluble oil pastels -colored India ink drawings -a self-portrait photograph, and sketch of women with charcoal found on the beach lined in Ink later, both printed on parchment paper glued to the sketch with 'water mixable oil Matt Varnish' -on Arches archival watercolour block, 15"x20", 38mmx41mm, 2008-9. Words from a prosepoem written on the back of the sheet that the drawings of the women on the beach were on: In the Middle of August in the Summer of 2008.



Scans from my notebook, written and sketched on the beach on that day, August 15th, 2008. Yes, I use a Moleskine®.

Women who were standing on the beach drawn with tiny pieces of charcoal found in the sand and later the outlines inked and the sketch sprayed with Krylon® matte fixative. Scanned onto parchment paper and affixed with Windsor&Newton® matt varnish.



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